Fed Up Lincoln
by 763Boi
Summary: Multiple one shots focusing on Lincoln getting fed-up with all the bullshit in his life. Some are badass, some are simple, and some could get violent.
1. Cereal Offender

Lincoln ran to the isle to see the last box of Zombie Bran. "Phew! The last box, and its all-", Lincoln said until someone interupted him.

He turnt around to see the kid that laughed at him when he fell in the pineappes. "Mine!", the kid said. Lincoln couldnt take it, "Woah woah woah. I worked my ass off to get this.", Lincoln said as he walked closer to the boy.

The kid backed up a bit, "And then your bitchass comes up to snatch it. And I have 9 dumbass sisters trying to stop me from getting it.", Lincoln said again, with venom is his voice.

The sisters came around the corner just as Lincoln cocked his fist back.

 ** _In the Loud Family car,_** "Good job Lincoln, I guess you really could manage the grocery shopping.", Mrs. Loud said. "How come Lincoln got a treat?", Lana asked. "He made a deal, if you wanted a treat, you should've asked.", Mrs. Loud replied.

While Lincoln enjoyed eating his cereal, a certain someone enjoyed using dentures at 11.


	2. One of The Boys

Lincoln has had enough of these douches taunting him. "SHUT THE FUCK UP!", Lincoln yelled as the brothers all looked at him. "DOES IT LOOK LKKE I GIVE A SINGULAR SHIT WHAT YOU SAY!?", Lincoln roared. "Bro, what the hell?", Luke said. Lincoln did one thing, KNOCKED HIS ASS OUT! "LOKI, YOUR A SOCIOPATHIC FREAK WHO ONLY CARES ABOUT HIS OH SO PRECIOUS GIRLFRIEND WHO PROBABLY CHEATS ON YOU EVERY CHANCE SHE GETS!", Lincoln said.

Loki hissed at that, he wondered if Bebe would ever cheat. "LONI, SIT YOUR DUMBASS DOWN WITH YO UGLY ASS OUTFIT! YOU LOOK LIKE A DAMN FUCKBOY! PROBABLY BEATIN YOUR MEAT TO PICTURES OF FUCKING LUKE! AND HE LOOKS LIKE A RIP-OFF KISS MEMBER!", Loni just fell over. "THE REST OF YALL LOOK LIKE SOME FUCKING MUSICA.LY STARS! SO ALL OF YOU CAN SHUT THE FUCK UP!", Lincoln yelled. He pulled out the watch and opened up the portal, "Go burn in hell you fuckwads. Im livin some Rick and Morty shit.", Lincoln said as he hopped through the portal.


	3. Fools Paradise

**_Probably the longest chapter of Fed Up Linc, but hey, whatever. Also, am I the only one who could imagine the Louds minus Luna singing, "Cant Hold Us", by Macklemore and Ryan Lewis? Next idea for Music in The Wind omg._**

"Oh, I was just reading this ad for a clown camp that runs over April Fools weekend.", Leni said. Everyone was about to freak out, until Lincoln yelled quiet. "Lisa, go grab your cosmetic kit and the documents of all of our fingerprints, including Mom and Dad.", Lincoln said.

Lisa quickly left and returned with the files and the kit. Everyone walked downstairs and saw Luan and Lynn Sr. sitting down at the table. "Everyone out here, now!", Lincoln said as his parents and the rest of the sisters sat down. "We found this ad for a clown camp in Lenis magazine.", Lincoln said. "What!?", Luan yelled as she was about to grab the magazine. "Sit... down.", Lincoln said in a tone that sent chills down Luans spine.

Lincoln quickly grabbed a magnifying glass and a pair of tweezers. He grabbed the corner of the page and very carefully peeled it off, revealing it to be a fake. The Louds gasped, "What the heck?", Lana said. Lincoln could see Luans face become white. He then took out his phone and looked up the camp, and prooved it to be fake. "I am litteraly so confused.", Lori said.

Lincoln then took out some fingerprint powder and put some on the page, he then dusted and found them. He grabbed the files as Lisa handed him a scanner to detect if they match any of their family members. He scanned them, "Alright, it shows here that it does not match Lori, Leni, Luna, Lynn, Me, Lucy, Lana, Lola, Lisa, Lily, or Mom.", Lincoln said. They all looked at Lynn Sr. and Luan.

They began to sweat. "Lisa, can you also show me the security footage of Luan and Lunas room, from yesterday from 3-5 pm, exactly when all of us, minus Luan and Dad, wouldve been out.", Lincoln said. Once again, Lisa came back with the hard drive as Lincoln connected it to his laptop and sat it on the table. The video revealed their father ironing the ad into Lenis magazine, while Luan drew out plans. Lincoln then stomped up to Luans room and returned with said plans.

Lincoln placed them on the table and read, "According to Luans plan, she recruited Dad by promising him a decade without pranking, and then they devised this very specific plan. We would show mom and dad the ad and Luan would freak out, we'd send her there but would use one of Lunas fog machines to fake a breakdown. And this time, Lana would have no tools. We'd enter the convinently placed 'motel' right next to us. She then would proceed to do the following.", Lincoln explained.

Everyone was dumbfounded to hear what Lincoln read out. "In our room, she would have a fake cricket wake us up, to have one of us turn on a light, which would also turn on every other electronic in the room. After disabling the noise, someone would read the voicemail Luan left on all of our phones, we would then proceed to freak out at which we would leave the room. Then, Lisa would get stuck in between the bed, Leni would be launched into the air and onto a bunch of sticky pads on the sign of the place, Lola would run into a fake room filled with skunks, Lana would bash through a room door, but fall into rhubarb pie, which shes allergic to.", Lincoln said.

Lincoln continued, "Then Luna would get stuck in gelatin, Mom would get trapped under clothes in the laundry room, Lucy would get covered in bleach, Lily would be replaced with a monkey while the actual Lily would be sitting in the office with Luan, who is disguised as the manager. Lynn would then pick up the monkey which would attack her, then me and dad would go up to the roof, at which I would be... LAUNCHED OFF INTO THE STREET!? Nad this all wouldn't be forgotten due to having the locations written on dads right arm.", Lincoln finished.

Rita rolled up her husbands sleeve and found it to be true. Lincoln stood up, "BITCH! YOU AND PENIS NOSE GANGED UP ON US?!", he yelled. Luan stared at her brother. "You know what, no more. If we ever get another April Fools riot again, im going to see if the McBrides have room for one more, AND YOU!", Lincoln said, looking at Lynn Sr. "If you ever, EVER do anything like this, putting your wife AND children in danger or on the verge of death, Ill call Child Protective Services and have you thrown in jail for child abuse.", Lincoln said as he tore up the magazine and spat in Luans face.


	4. Save the Date 1

Lincoln sat stood up at the end of the lunch table pulling a sloppy joe out of his pants. "Oh my fucking god, what is it with this girl!?", Lincoln yelled. "Whens tuenwedding day Lincoln?", one boy taunted as the table broke out laughing. Lincoln cli,ned up on the table, "Bruh, go fuck yourself. You look like a legit butterball that would put Boogie2988 to shame.", Lincoln said. The boy winced at that and stormed off.

Lincoln stared at everyone else, "Who else wants to taunt me, see what the fuck happens.", Lincoln said. The others kept their mouths shut. Just then, Ronnie Anne walked in. "I swear to fucking god, Ronnie Anne is annoying as hell, this is all bullshit.", Lincoln said. "Dude, shes behind you.", Clyde said. Lincoln turnt around and saw a very angry Ronnie Anne. "Oh look, heres the bitch now.", Lincoln said. He walked over to her and cleared his throat.

"You.. are... done. HOE! GET YOUR LATINA LOOKIN ASS OUTTA HERE! YOUR THE ONE LATINA THAT AINT HOT FO NOTHIN! YOU HEAD LOOKS A PEANUT AND 2 GUMDROPS! GET YO DUMBASS OUT HERE WITH THAT TOUGH GIRL BULLSHIT! WE ALL KNOW YOUR A LITTLE BITCH! SO GET YOUR LEGIT DUM DUM BUBBLEGUM LOOKING ASS THE FUCK OUTTA HERE BEFORE YOU GET A LITTLE MORE THAN THE 10 PIECE MCNUGGET!", Lincoln roared.

Ronnie Anne filled with so much anger that she lunged at Lincoln, but she missed and smacked her head into a tray of nachos. Lincoln broke down laughing like a fucking hyena, Ronnie Anne stared at him, and then threw a tray at him, but again, missed. Lincoln just took a tray and smacked her across the head with it, then left.


	5. Dance Dance Resolution

"You better not flake.", Luna said. "Well fine then you bitch, lets play the, **how far can I fuck over my sibling** game!", Lincoln retorted as he kicked her in the shin and walked out the door.

 _ **At this bullshit dance:**_

"So they expected you to juggle four fucking dates?", Tabby said. "Yep, all because I was going to the arcade.", Lincoln said. The 4 girls nodded and left, presumably to cut some ties with the 4 bitches Lincoln called sisters.

 _AcropolisGD Edition:_

Luna: Dont dude flake dude

Linkin Park: Fuck you to then

 _At the most pointless part of the episode:_

Toby: So basically your sisters are dicks.

Linkin Park: Tell me something I dont fukin kno

The 4 randomly added pointless characters left.

Robbie Rotten: Lets go to the fukin arcade

Linkin Park: Plz kill me


	6. April Fools Rules

Lincoln left.


	7. Space Invader

After one night of torture, Lincoln had enough. He stomped over to his bedroom door and kicked it open, "Hey Linc.", Lynn said. Lincoln grabbed her and all her shit and dragged her to her room. He kicked her door open to see Lucy, startled.

She then got up and was about to yell at Lynn, until Lincoln grabbed her and sat down. "Listen the fuck up, if you to dont make up, im gonna loose it.", Lincoln said sternly. "If you ever grip me up like that again, dad will be upset.", Lucy said. "Wont dad also be upset when he finds his daughter outback with 10 siblings saying they saw her fall.", Lincoln said as hemlooked Lucy in the eyes. Lucy gasped, she then started to beg Lynn for forgiveness as Lincoln left.

"Assholes.", Lincoln said.


	8. Sound of Silence

"So all you made me do today, was all a joke?", Lincoln said. "Yup.", the sisters replied. "Well fuck you to.", Lincoln said, "What?", Lola said, suprised. "Im not some slave, you cant just make me do a bunch of bullshit. I have the right to ignore you if I want, but theres one thing I do remember yesterday.", Lincoln said as he ran into Lisas room, quickly gave her the right chemical before coming back, putting the earbuds in, and pushing the sisters out.


	9. Sleuth and Consequences

"Your going out in public like that?!", Lola cried as they all laughed. "Fuck you all, your just mad because you cant make fun of me because I actuallactually found a talent.", Lincoln said as he walked out the door, leaving to Clydes house.

 ** _Alt #2_** "You know how they are, theyd make fun of me for the rest of my life.", Lucy said. "Well to fucking bad, go confess before I break you arm.", Lincoln said. Then Lincoln enjoyed his convention while Lucy cried herself to sleep :D


	10. Overnight Success

"Id hate to leave the kid hanging, Lincoln.", Clyde said. Lincoln stared at him, "Well get the fuck out my house, if your gonna be a picky asshole, fuck off.", Lincoln said. Clyde gasped, "Im just trying to help them out, then we can get the plan started!", Clyde said.

"I SAID OUT!", Lincoln yelled, the sisters saw how tense the situation was getting and wisely left. Lincoln looked at Clyde, ready to go insane. Clyde slowly backed up, until tripping and falling down the steps. "Take ya shit and go.", Lincoln said. Clyde practically grabbed everything and bolted out the door.


	11. Overnight Success Original Edition

Lincoln walked upstairs and into Luan and Lunas room, where he found Clyde with his sisters. "Why thenfuck are you still here?", Lincoln said as he stared Clyde dead in the eyes. Clyde just shrugged as he continued to talk with Lincolns sisters.

That was until they heard a faint sound of clenching teeth, he looked up to see Lincoln at full on rage mode. His face was red, fists clenched, and his teeth rubbing against eachother. The sisters saw shit was bout to go down and smartly left.

Upstairs they heard a bit of russling as Clyde popped out the door with an obviously broken nose and ran downstairs and out the door.


	12. Tricked

Lincoln and Clyde walked back onto Franklin Avenue, only to see empty candy wrappers, broken costumes, and a slight hint of blood. Approaching the Loud house, they saw the others sitting outside. "What happened here?", Lincoln asked. "A couole of meanies came through, stole our candy, and destroyed all the Jack-o-lanterns!", Lola exclaimed.

"Oh, whatever, me and Clyde hit it big.", Lincoln said as he reached into his bag and pulled out a full sized candy bar. "WHERE DID YOU GET THAT!?", the others yelled as they stared at the bar of chocolatey goodness. "None of you damn business.", Lincoln said as he took a bite. Then they heard steps and turnt around and saw Hank and Hawk standing behind them. "You two have about 2 seconds to give us all of your chocolate or we will beat you to a pulp.", Hank said. Lincoln laughed as he reached into his pocket and pulled out a butterfly knife. "Orrrrr, you to could hand over my sisters candy before I have to slit some throats.", Lincoln said, a fake crazy smile crossing his face. The two turnt Lucy white as they dropped the bags and ran.

"Uhhhh, son. Thanks for getting the candy back, but how did you acquire such a dangerous weapon?", Lynn Sr. asked. "Oh this? This is actually a comb.", Lincoln said as he opened it, revealing it to be true. "My real ones upstairs.", Lincoln said again. "Also, brother unit, you never offered to share those oversized bars of sugary deliciousness.", Lisa said with an orgasmy face. "You thought I was sharing? Your funnier than Luan!", Lincoln said. He then shoved Clyde aside and took his bag, he then ran inside and locked his bedroom door.


	13. Party Down

"Yeah, my moms toe, its all better now.", Dana said. "Wait, wait, wait.", Lincoln said as he stared at the crowd of teenagers. "What kind of friends are you? Lori worked hard in her party and you show her absolutely no respect, and when she joins ours you all think you can just barge in here?", Lincoln yelled.

"Well its not our fault her party was lame.", Chaz said. "Excuse me? I swear to god if your fat-ass shames my sister like that again, I wont hesitate to kick your ass.", Lincoln said as he gave the 'Im watching you' motion. "Well, are we going to talk or are we going to party.", one boy said. "No.", Lincoln said taking the stack of pizzas. "You are going to leave because you have no respect for anybody.", Lincoln said.

"You little shit.", Chaz said as he kicked Lincoln in the stomach. Lincoln doubled over in pain as the Loud sisters gasped, "You son of a bitch!", Leni yelled, she had seen him working at a shop in the mall before, she actually kinda liked him, but no longer. The two groups stared eachother down, until they heard the sound of stomping. They looked down to see Lincoln eying Chaz down as if he were to kill him.

Lincoln grabbed him by his crusty ass hair and brought him down to his level, he whispered in his hear before violently shoving him back by the head, revealing the cops outside. Lincoln laughed his ass off while the group of teens were escorted outside to be questioned while Chaz was put in handcuffs.


	14. Nasty Girl

The next day, Ronnie Anne woke up, dried tear marks covering her face, pregnant?! Really!? She sank back down and tried to fall back asleep, it didnt work. She got up and changed and went outside, she walked to Poppa's house and knocked on the door.

Poppa Wheelie opened the door and saw Ronnie Anne, he instantly slammed the door. "Get your fat-ass out here!", she yelled. Poppa sighed as he walked out. "What do you want.", he asked. "We need to discuss the baby issue.", Ronnie said. "Psh, im not taking care of it.", Poppa said. "Yes you are! You made it!", she yelled back.

"Make that Loud bitch do it.", he replied. "At least that Loud bitch has the balls to take care of his fucking child! Maybe I was wrong, he is 10x the man you are!", she said. Poppa turnt around and pimp slapped her, "Fuck off latina slut!", he yelled. That was until she walked away, and 10 minutes later, a certain someone in a dragon costume came walking down the street.

Ronnie Anne knocked on the door of the Loud's as Lincoln answered, he saw her and called Lori down. "What do you want!", Lori exclaimed. "I need to talk to Lincoln.", Ronnie replied. "Yeah, he tottaly wants to see you.", Lori said. "Im serious!", she replied.

"Ok fine, what the fuck do you want.", Lincoln said as he moved Lori out of the way. "I- i might need you to be a father.", Ronnie Anne said. Lincoln stared at her, and began to laugh. "Y- your saying that the fat-fuck you call a man got you pregnant?", Lincoln exclaimed as he slapped his knee.

"Please! Im so sorry for what I said!", she replied as tears formed in her eyes. "So you dont even want me back? You just want me to father a child that isnt mine, yeah, hell no.", he said as he slammed the door on her face.


End file.
